Ever blown soap bubbles? They're great aren't they?  Soap bubbles are like life and chances.  You only get one unique bubble and they strive to fly as high as they can to reach the sky.  I guess that's like me in a way, a soap bubble wanting to fly as high as I can.  I want to reach space! I want to put my foot on the doors of heaven and shout "I am here!....okay bye now"

 

 

 

 

 

A couple of weeks back I was having dinner at Kwai Sun near Taylor's with my friends and I decided to drop by a bit early.  As I was waiting outside the restaurant there was a commotion on the opposite street involving a couple, I think they were Malay.  She was crying her heart out and the guy,obviously her boyfriend, just stood there staring at her blankly.  I don't know why, but my heart started to break seeing this type of situation occur before my eyes.  It was so heart wrenching and pain stakingly hard to watch.  They disappeared out of the corner of my eye and I decided to take a walk to settle my heart and my mind.  Why was I so influenced in seeing them fight, cry, and hit each other?  Was it because I understood that woman's feelings?  The moment I saw her face I knew what had happened or the general idea of it.  She had the look of confusion, the impression as to why someone can do something like this to her, she had the look of being betrayed.  I really felt sorry for the two of them, especially for the woman who looked to be suffering the most.  It just made me think about my past.  I'm so thankful that I'm able to stand on my own two feet once again.  It truly is a blessing that I am able to patch back my world and make it stronger once again. Go Ryan! Fighter of Love! 

                                               

The other day I was at Pyramid and I just happened to go into this pharmaceutical store. It wasn't Guardian or Watson's. It was some Chinese version of it.  I was browsing around hoping to find something that could catch my eye. I had the munchies to just buy something that day =p.  Well I came round the corner and something definitely did catch my eye!  It was hard not to laugh at what I saw.  Here we have a multinational company promoting one of its products. Fair enough.  What they were promoting?  Exactly this...

 

 

                                           (Check out the wordings at the top)

 

And another one....

 

                                         (This time the wordings at the bottom)

 

 

 

Imagine! I can be as horny as a goat after taking a couple of these things! Oh yes Ryan, that's the way to a woman's heart.  10 points.  I'd love to check out their customer's testimonials.  

A little too gross I know.  So to take a lighter note on things here's just some pictures I took with my friends until I can come up with something interesting to write about again...enjoy!

 

 

 

 

 

Ah yes now I remember what I wanted to say =D 

 

I was at Pavillion, KL with Sandy and Atsuyo and while Sandy was on the phone she happened to steal my phone away as well.  Not sure why she wanted two phones, but I found the reason out when she showed me this.  I've never seen myself photographed trying to pimp out a lady so it really came as a surprise to me when she showed me just how much of a retard I looked like.

 

I was hanging out with Shazan as well and we were looking around for some booze.  We ended up getting Jack Daniels (tastes really good with a cream soda by the way...), but before paying for it I just had to snap this picture.  Isn't it great?  Looks like this bottle is looking out for its gay community.

 

(Check out the last phrase..Love Juice anyone?)

  

 

Sigh I can't blog anymore...it's too tiring...I have so many things to talk about.  Anyways I'm gonna end this with my ambitions.  I'm going LIVE ON AIR JULY 1st. Please support me everyone!

Wow....

It's been such a long time since I've blogged.  How are you guys? Wait...p(=.='')p....I doubt any of you are reading this anyways. So...how are you Ryan?  Well things have taken a huge turn around for me since my arrival back to KL.  Lets take a look shall we? 

 

                                                                                                       I guess the best way to describe my arrival back would be like a trip to hell/heaven and back again.  Lets see I guess my story can be traced back to when I was in the UK with my now ex-girlfriend.  But, before I plaster you with my atrocities and scandals that I "supposedly" did I'll need to tell you a little bit about myself and my life in the country of my fore fathers.

 

 

The United Kingdom, home of the brave, the Queen of England, the birth place of the Industrial Revolution and the founders of the greatest sport in the world, football (soccer for us Americans and others).  Now, I love Europe. Why? It's because I'm from Europe. Born and bred.  For those who know me, I'm probably the most saddest Malaysian out there.  I know nothing about Malaysia and I'm labelled as a loser tourist.  Who cares =D

 

I've stayed in the UK several times before hand but this was my very first time bringing along extra baggage.  That's right.  Good 'ol Ryan is bringing someone back with him to Europe.  This might be a bit of a shock for my friends in Europe since they know that I never bring extra baggage along with me and I never ever am happy about bringing along extra baggage.  But this was an exception. 

 

Anyways...we were there for a year and I was loving it.  The cities, the people, the travelling.  I thought I had it all really. I never once thought of going back to Malaysia.  I actually thought I'd get married and settle down in Europe =S   But things took a turn when I had to make a decision on whether or not to go back and live there or separate and stay back.  I was actually quite confused about the whole situation, but in the end...

 

I promised and made a vow that I will come back to Malaysia and find a nice job, settle down and marry.  Promise, mind you.  My grandfather more than anyone else taught me the values of life and how to treat a lady. 

                            "Promises Ryan, are never made to be broken. Keep to them. die by them, and if you must take your entire life

                             to fulfil them.  If you promise a woman the world you are only asking for trouble, but if you promise her that you will

                             try...it will mean the world to her and will forever rest her head on your shoulders."

                                                                                                                                                                          --Grandpa 1989--

And so I lived and died by this code making only a few promises and making sure that I kept to them.  Little did I know that my promise to you would take me on a journey that would test me and strip me naked of my pride, joy, and love. 

 

Keeping my promise to you I left it like that I decided to ask the opinions of a few friends in Malaysia. 

Ryan:  Hey listen, I've decided to come back to Malaysia.

Peeps: What?! Why? Malaysia sucks man why do you want to come back?

Ryan:  Nah man, I'll be fine I'll get a good job and I'll settle down there. Problem is what kind of job can I get what doesn't require Malay?

Peeps: Wei, all jobs here require Malay lah. You think you can survive here meh? Die lah you if you come back!

Ryan: Don't worry if I'll die or not okay I want to be happy and I want Ying to be happy so I'm moving back.  Be happy I'll get to hang out like the good 'ol days.

Peeps: Actually....I'm moving out of Malaysia.

Ryan: What? Why?

Peeps: Fuck lah this country. New Zealand is much nicer.

Ryan:  Go to Singapore then.  At least the pay is better and you'll be closer to home =D

Peeps: Blady Fool you think Singapore so nice one meh?  Even worse than Malaysia! Have to pay tax, got shitty jobs there, somemore they damn kiasu. 

Ryan:  .....Okay. Well I don't care I'm gonna head back.  Remember that you create your own happiness wherever you go so don't be running away from your problems alright?

Peeps:  Ok whatever. Just make sure you buy something for me when you come back.

Ryan: (=.='')

 

Things didn't look so bright for me with my friends even telling me that I had little chance of surviving in Malaysia, but I didn't care. I knew that if you put your mind to it you can create your own happiness and your life will always turn out for the better and that's exactly what I did. 

                                                        "The footsteps towards happiness always begin with your own"

                                                                                                                =D  ---Ryan 2008---  =D

 

 And that was exactly what I did. I took my first steps into fulfilling my dreams.  Again, little did I know what I was getting myself into.  Packed my stuff, booked my ticket and said my goodbyes.  Or so I thought.....

 

Little did I know that you would break your promise to me...the promise of never looking back. Of never going back to your old self. Tsk tsk tsk silly Ryan to believe you.   Silly Ryan to promise that he would come back and silly Ryan to promise to try and make it work. Ai Ai Ai what did you get yourself into Ryan?!

 

 My heart turned into paper and slowly burned away.

 

Anyways, that was all in the past.  You can't imagine what it was like to know what I knew and still fly back with you sitting right next to me. Couldn't even kiss your properly without thinking about it.  Aha! Didn't think I would find out did you now?  There's so much shit I know about you that you didn't know I can't believe I put up with it.

 

 

 

                                            "No matter what you do, the truth will sooner or later come back and find you. Smile, its Karma."

                                                                                                                             =D   --Ryan 2008---  =D

 

Besides being broken down to my very core.  I also had an internal struggle with myself.  What do I do now? My driving force, my energy, the one that gave me meaning to life just went and took a shit on my head and flew off!   Where do I go from here on out? So I prayed. God is just fantastic.  He's the one person that will never let you down.  He's always there for you if you need him, provided that you do your part.  Proud to say that till today I've become quite the church-goer. =D

 

 

Speaking of people letting me down.  Coming back to Malaysia, I thought handling one betrayal was enough I didn't know that I would be having another one right around the corner.  As most people know my family's not that great.  Parents have been having a messy divorce case for 5 years now and it's just reaching its climax.  One thing I am very firm on was the fact that I didn't want to get involved with this case nor involve my sister.   I asked both my parents not to involve us in any way possible.  They agreed ofcourse.  I mean come on, we are the results of marriage.  Why must we be punished as well for their mistakes?  Sure we can support them in any way possible, but just don't get us involved.  But, do they keep their promise?

 

                                                                                         

 

Why mom why?? Argh!

 

 

I found out through my father that my mother is suing me for property I never wanted in the first place.  Her own son! I was so devastated.  The one woman I thought would always be there for me. Would never betray me.  Would never even think of hurting me does this to me.  Well basically I couldn't handle it.  It was all too much in such a short span of time.  I couldn't trust anyone.  The only buddy I could look up to, Shazan!  Though he didn't know much about the entire situation, he's my brother no matter what. 

 

 (Bros before hoes)

 

He was there to support me in my time of need and I wish and I know that whenever he's in the shit's I'm gonna be there for him.  Sweeeet dude...

 

That was the end of my story with women. I've had it with them.  They're so fickle minded and obscure of what they want or what they do.  If I could sum them up in one picture it would be this.

 

                                                               

 

Ok I'm gonna get a lot of angry females now. But, I'm sorry okay! I'm going through some major shit right now gimme a break.  I'll be a gentlemen in 5 minutes. Okay, anyways lets move onto a new topic shall we?

 

Jobs! Man, I am so unlucky with jobs in Malaysia its not even funny.  (I get the feeling someone is laughing).

 

Well, I knew that it was going to be hard and it was hard.  I struggled and could not find something that was suited for me.  Banks, event companies, gigolos (just kidding....well maybe) you name it I went for their interviews and tests.  It came to a point where my interviewers even suggested that I move to Singapore and find work there.  They pitied me! Not a good idea to pity me.

 

I'm capable of making my own success.  But being the cheap loser that I am I took their advice anyhow and went to Singapore for interviews.  In summary, it didn't go too well.  The pay was too low, there wasn't a strong career progression, and most of all they didn't like the fact that I was Malaysian (which I'm sorta now if you just listened to me). I seriously that I was just gonna kill myself! Argh! Kidding!  Like hell I'd do something like that....hmmm

 

                                                                                                                                                                                   (Smoky: The fuck you want bitch?!)

 

I did accept a job though in Singapore and was planning on moving there. But, I'm glad to say that I am still in Malaysia. I turned them down. Why you might ask?  What is Ryan thinking? Does he want to be a jobless asswipe the rest of his life?

 

 

No, I have a job now. It's a fantastic job.  It was a job I thought that would only appear in my dears.  I'm now a radio dj working for Astro! Isn't that cool? Ryan, a radio dj! I have the most crappiest voice out there and 12 million Malaysians are gonna get pissed just listening to it. Awesome!

 

Not only that. Oh oh oh I'm happy too! I've got great friends now.  There's Sandy, Shazan, Tracy, Jane, Sze May (*smirk), Emily (double poke), all my church friends....all my highschool buddies....college mate...everyone!

(Sandy and I) 

 

Well this is just a short introduction to my 3 months here.  It's been hectic, I wish and pray that it will slow down just a bit so I can pick up the pieces of my life that still remain and build it up again.  Thanks for being there for me everyone. You guys are the best.  Stay tuned for my next one at the end of June!